Mark Twain’s almost-history as a drug lord.  In 1856, a twenty-one-year-old Mark Twain was stranded in Keokuk, Iowa, working for his brother’s printing office, bored to death by the small town’s soporific pace. Restless, he needed a change. He started reading about the Amazon River, and soon cooked up a scheme to sail to Brazil. In August, he wrote to his younger brother Henry about his plans. Fifty-four years later, he reminisced about the episode in an essay published just two months before his death in April 1910: Among the books that interested me in those days was one about the Amazon… [H]e told an astonishing tale about coca, a vegetable product of miraculous powers, asserting that it was so nourishing and so strength-giving that the native of the mountains of the Madeira region would tramp up hill and down all day on a pinch of powdered coca and require no other sustenance. I was fired with a longing to ascend the Amazon. Also with a longing to open up a trade in coca with all the world. During months I dreamed that dream, and tried to contrive ways to get to Para and spring that splendid enterprise upon an unsuspecting planet. In short: Mark Twain, at twenty-one, almost became a drug dealer. He wanted to go to Brazil and start importing cocaine into the United States. He got as far as New Orleans before he decided to become a steamboat pilot instead.

Mark Twain’s almost-history as a drug lord. 

In 1856, a twenty-one-year-old Mark Twain was stranded in Keokuk, Iowa, working for his brother’s printing office, bored to death by the small town’s soporific pace. Restless, he needed a change. He started reading about the Amazon River, and soon cooked up a scheme to sail to Brazil. In August, he wrote to his younger brother Henry about his plans. Fifty-four years later, he reminisced about the episode in an essay published just two months before his death in April 1910:

Among the books that interested me in those days was one about the Amazon… [H]e told an astonishing tale about coca, a vegetable product of miraculous powers, asserting that it was so nourishing and so strength-giving that the native of the mountains of the Madeira region would tramp up hill and down all day on a pinch of powdered coca and require no other sustenance. I was fired with a longing to ascend the Amazon. Also with a longing to open up a trade in coca with all the world. During months I dreamed that dream, and tried to contrive ways to get to Para and spring that splendid enterprise upon an unsuspecting planet.

In short: Mark Twain, at twenty-one, almost became a drug dealer. He wanted to go to Brazil and start importing cocaine into the United States. He got as far as New Orleans before he decided to become a steamboat pilot instead.

This post has 295 notes.
  1. childrens-pamper-party-lincoln reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  2. tablets-on-sale reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  3. replica-louis-vuitton-handbags reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  4. hollywood-lashes-lincoln reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  5. stop-snoring-pillow reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  6. outlook-pst--repair reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  7. unlock-iphone-3g reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  8. flexseal reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  9. thelattimersociety reblogged this from laphamsquarterly
  10. steauridge reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  11. faptomypictures reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  12. luckychrysler reblogged this from youmightfindyourself and added:
    pictorial reference
  13. growingheavyforthevintage reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  14. loziofabio reblogged this from youmightfindyourself and added:
    youmightfindyourself:
  15. jnrsobs reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  16. whatwouldgodotdo reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  17. mybloodflowsharshly reblogged this from forestlessness
  18. elmonkie reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  19. forestlessness reblogged this from on-display and added:
    This proves that Iowa is a dangerous place for bored intellectuals.
  20. lucyford reblogged this from youmightfindyourself
  21. kanyi reblogged this from tarnoff and added:
    Tarnoff going viral!! Awesome story, though.